


The Curse of the Job

by LightningStarborne, ThunderAirborne



Category: James Bond (Craig movies), Sherlock (TV)
Genre: 00Q - Freeform, AU, Amnesia, Angst, GFY, M/M, Q is a Holmes, i can't tag, sorry - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-18
Updated: 2014-05-18
Packaged: 2018-01-25 14:48:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 10,851
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1652534
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LightningStarborne/pseuds/LightningStarborne, https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThunderAirborne/pseuds/ThunderAirborne
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A bomb went off during a mission and it put James into a coma. After about a week, he woke up.<br/>Things get worse than anybody ever imagined<br/>Especially for Q.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

When James woke up, he could tell something was off. What exactly that was, he had no idea. He opened his eyes to blinding white walls and knew that he was in medical. _What the hell?_ Either he had hit his head hard enough for short-term memory loss, or something was severely wrong.

James lifter his head and winced. He felt like someone was pounding on the inside of his head with a hammer. He lowered his head and turned it gingerly to the side. He saw Alec sitting there. Thank god. If it had been anyone else he probably would have tried to kill them. Unless it was a Doctor.

Alec looked tired, like he had been sitting there for a while. He probably had. James remembered a time when he had almost died and Alec had sat by his bed for a week. The other man was loyal to the grave, whether it was to queen and country, or to the people he cared for.

“Alec,” James croaked out, and immediately regretted it. His throat was on fire and his mouth felt like Death Valley it was so dry.

The other man’s head snapped up at his voice. “ _James_ ,” he sounded so relieved that James had woken up, and he wondered what he’d done this time. Almost having died seemed like a likely possibility.

“No, I’m Tom Hiddleston.”

“Well at least I know you haven’t lost your sense of humour,” despite his light words Alec sounded deadly serious and extremely worried. “We’ve been worried. You’ve been out for a week. I think Q’s paced a groove in the floor.” Alec chuckled.

“He survived the explosion?” at these words Alec’s playful expression turned serious.

“What explosion?”

James frowned. Alec had been there when Q-branch exploded hadn’t he? If not he surely would have seen it on the news. “The explosion in MI6. I saw it on the news.”

“What explosion in MI6? There hasn’t been one in 16 years. James, what is the last thing you remember?” Alec was now confusing James. There had been an explosion. He had seen it when he had been in that bar. He would know that building anywhere.

“Alec, you’re confusing me. The last thing I remember….. I was in M’s flat, after recovering from Eve shooting me off that train.” James knew that was not going to make much sense to Alec, as he hadn’t told the other man yet.

“As in… Skyfall? Operation Skyfall?”

“Yeah, I didn’t know that you knew about it.” Now James was starting to get worried. Alec was staring at him with something akin to horror. He also thought that M hadn’t told everyone about Skyfall, only a few.

Then Alec abruptly stood up and walked over to a nurse. He spoke rapidly with her before she too turned to gape at him. He was really starting to get irritated at this; he was not some sort of freak show, and he refused to be treated like one.

“Will you two stop staring at me like some sort of freak show and tell me what’s wrong?”

Alec turned back to the nurse, and said something else. She walked away quickly. Alec walked back over to the hospital bed that James was in and sat down beside it.

“Alec, would you mind telling me what’s wrong? And where did that nurse go?” James shot the questions at Alec like a gun. He was getting real tired real fast at Alec refusing to tell him anything.

“The nurse went to get the head doctor. And as for what’s wrong, we believe that you have amnesia.” Alec said it quickly, like he was trying to rip off a Band-Aid. This, with James’ reaction, wasn’t that far from the truth.

“ _Amnesia?_ ” James couldn’t believe his ears. The famous 007 getting amnesia? No. “How could I have possibly gotten amnesia? And how much time have I apparently lost?”

Alec looked a little guilty. “In a bomb in Russia last week. We were on a mission together, and you got hit in the head with one of the pieces. And as for how long?” Alec hesitated. He obviously didn’t want to say.

“ _How long Alec?_ ” he would have throttled his best friend then and there if his head hadn’t been trying to pound out of his head.

“I’m not exactly sure, but…” again Alec hesitated.

“ _Alec Trevelyn,_ I will throttle you if you do not tell me how much time I’ve lost.” James growled.

“Sixteen…” again he hesitated, then he took a deep breath. “You are missing sixteen years of your life.”

James stared at him, uncomprehending. He could not possibly have forgotten _sixteen years_ of his life. Anything could have happened. He could have gotten married, unlikely, or a lover or he could have almost died again. Anybody could have died. James realized that he was getting nowhere with this and looked Alec in the eye and said,

_“Years?”_


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Q finds out (remember this is 00Q and serious AU)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys. Hope you've like it thus far. Apologies for the cliffhanger. Not that it affects anyone though since I'm adding these on the same day.  
> Please comment, I appreciate constructive criticism.   
> IMPORTANT NOTE: James and Q are married in this, just FYI. They also have two kids (adopted). They are James (who is 16 and named after 007) and Penny (who is 13).  
> Q called dad and James papa.

Alec left almost immediately after telling James that news. He told James it was to talk to someone. James assumed it was to tell them about his 'condition'.

Alec stormed into Q-branch looking more worried than any of the minions had ever seen him. He went straight towards the Quartermaster. Q was a bit too caught up in his work to realize Alec was there.

'Q.'

He looked up at Alec, eyes hopeful.

'He's awake.'

Q headed to the door. Alec grabbed his arm.

'You might want to here what I have to say first.'

'My office then.' Alec hated hearing Q sound so... broken. Despite the fact James was the one he married, Alec would do anything to take that brokenness out of Q's voice.

They went to Q's office. Q gripped his desk.

'Spill it.'

'He has amnesia.' Alec wasn't quite prepared for Q's reaction.

' _What?!'_

'He has no memory of the past sixteen years.'

He expected Q to respond with masking his emotions or tears. He got anger.

'Why?! Why?! Alec you knew he has a family! Why didn't you do something more?! How am I to tell James and Penny that their papa has no idea who they are?!'

Q continued to yell at Alec, but Alec knew it was from the stress he had been in for the last few days and the shock of the news. Q started to beat on Alec's chest until he just went limp. He started sobbing on his chest.

 Alec just held him until he stopped.

 

Back in medical James was trying to convince the nurses he was fine. One of them finally snapped.

'JAMES-BLOODY BOND YOU HAVE LOST ALMOST TWO  _DECADES_ OF MEMORY. IF YOU TRY AND LEAVE WE WILL TRANQ YOU.'

James couldn't remember medical being so feisty. He sat still anyway.

A few minute later a man walked in. More like a boy actually. He had adorably tousled hair and hazel-green eyes that were magnified by his glasses. James felt a pull to him, despite never having met him. Or maybe he had, he didn't know.

A nurse ran up to him and started to talk to him rapidly. The boy nodded and said something. He then started to walk up to James.

'I heard you're suffering memory loss 007.'

'You seem to have me at the disadvantage. You,obviously, know me but I don't know who you are.'

There was a flash of emotion on his face. It looked like grief, but James could have imagined it, for how fast it had passed.

'Q.' said the boy.

'You're Q? You're only a boy!'

'You said that to me the day we met.'

'I knew I recognized you. Can you tell me about what I'm missing.'

'No, I'd rather not. You should let them come back naturally.'

'That's no fun.'

Q looked like he was about to reply when his phone went off. He looked at it and winced.

'Something wrong?'

Q glared at him and answered his phone.

'I could very well be leading an agent through a mind field.'

Q laughed at the reply, but there was pain in it. James wondered why. 

Q left the room, leaving James more confused than ever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will probably averagely update on weekends. Occasionally I might update sooner.  
> Also: There is not going to be any Q/Alec. Alec and Q are just very close.


	3. Memories

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hullo! I'm Thunder Airborne's sis, Lightning Starborne. This is the first chapter I've written personally, but I will revise some of the earlier chapters to make them a tad longer. I know I absolutely hate it when I'm waiting, and then bam, it's updated, but it has only a few hundred words added. So I've tried to make this one longer than the others.  
> -LS

 “I know very well that you aren't leading an agent through the field. You've barely _done_ anything since Papa got hurt. Except pace a groove in the floor that is,” James admonished his dad.

Q laughed, but it was different, somehow pained, and that worried him. Then James could hear footsteps, “I was just talking to him you know and-“

“Really? Is he OK? Any permanent damage? Any-“ James was cut off by his father.

“If you be quiet and _listen_ I could tell you if something was wrong,” Q cut him off. Dad was _never_ that sharp. Especially, with James and Penny.

“He’s lost his memory.” James forgot to breathe. How could his papa lose his memory, everyone said he was semi-immortal, but then again they never said _untouchable_ and that seriously worried him. _How much memory had he lost, did he remember him and Penny, was he ever going to remember the lost time, what if-_ James cut himself off. He could deal with that later. He could ask dad. Dad would probably know. He would at least know more than James did. He took a deep breath and felt a dizziness that he hadn't noticed recede as he began to take in breath again.

“How much?” James asked. “Does he remember you?” James knew that if he at least remembered Dad, everything would be alright. He strained his ears for the answer. He wanted to make sure he understood the answer completely, and didn't miss anything. He would accept it if his father didn't remember the sixteen years of his life, but he would not be misled into believing anything but the truth.

“No. he doesn't.” James could hear his father’s voice break and it cut deeper into James’ heart than the knowledge of his papa’s memory loss ever could. His dad _never_ sounded that broken, and it hurt the teen more than he would _ever_ admit.

“How?” James whispered, “He loved you more than life itself, and to forget you,” James just shook his head. _“Impossible._ He would die before that ever happened.”

“James, are you ok?” James startled at the sound of his friend’s voice. He had forgotten that he was in school for a moment whilst he sunk deep into disbelief that his papa would forget him. “The bell is about to ring, and getting to class before it does would probably be a good idea.” James nodded, wiping away tears that he hadn't noticed before grabbing his books and closing his locker.

“I got to go now dad. Update me if he gets better? I want to know if anything happens to him.” James started walking towards class, his friend, Lee, following. “Bye,” James said before slipping his phone into his pocket.

“Are you sure you’re ok?” Lee asked worriedly, “You were crying. I could ask the secretary to let you leave early, if you’re feeling too bad…” Lee trailed off.

“No, it’s ok, I’ll be fine, plus we’ve only got two hours left before heading home.” James smiled in what he hoped was a reassuring way before walking towards math class.

00Q00Q00Q00Q00Q00Q00Q

Q put his phone in his pocket with shaky hands before taking a deep breath and walking towards Q-branch. He stiffened his spine and tried to put confidence in his gait. It would not do for the minions to see their Overlord have a mental breakdown. It seemed to work, as the minions watched him with curiosity in their gazes, not pity, and he relaxed a bit, before a minion asked what happened.

Q walked slowly to his desk before calling the attention of Q-branch. “007 has retrograde amnesia stretching back 16 years,” he said then mentally cursed as his voice broke.

The entire Q-branch looked shocked for a moment, before one of the minions got the courage to ask “Are you OK, sir?”

Q looked at the minion steadily for a moment; he fidgeted against the Quartermaster’s steady gaze, before their Evil Overlord said, without pretense, “No.”

Q-branch returned to their work after that cold, steady, _emotionless_ , statement that left everybody cold. They occasionally glanced up at their young boss, but he only worked silently. He seemed detached. One of the minions thought to bring him a cup of Earl Grey, which Q accepted gratefully, but his thank you seemed hollow. One of the double-ohs had come swaggering in with a cool, calm confidence, before seeing the glare the Quartermaster sent their way, and backtracking as fast as possible, which, being 00s, was fast. At one point the minions glanced up, and if they saw the tears glistening on Q’s cheeks, they didn't mention it.

00Q00Q00Q00Q00Q00Q00Q

James Bond, aka 007, had never been this confused before. He had recognized Q, and not from a mission, or because he looked like someone, but because of the care, and _worry_ he had seen in the other man’s eyes. He didn't understand it. It was like he had seen that look a million times, and just shrugged it off a normal. But he couldn't think of a single time he had. It was frustrating as hell to him, and he wished he could remember why. If _only_ he could remember why.

00Q00Q00Q00Q00Q00Q00Q

Alec was tempted to punch something. Preferably the person who managed to hit Bond hard enough to cause memory loss. Yes Bond could be obnoxious, but that wasn't enough to warrant memory loss. Particularly since Bond had a family to get back to. If you didn't like Bond, you would stick around because you couldn't help but like Q. And he didn't deserve the loss of the only person who he loved, who hadn't tried to use him.

Q had once told both Bond and Alec that his first boyfriend had told him to hack MI6, and that was why he had first joined. It was either join, or go to jail. Q had chosen to join, because he hadn't thought he would be able to actually hack them, and thought _Why not?_ He was already in enough trouble, ad this way he would get a job out of it.

The memory made Alec smile, but it faded, leaving only bitter regret when he remembered that he couldn't share his amusement at the memory with his best friend. He sighed and took a sip of the scotch he was drinking. He just wanted the man who had been his best friend for the past sixteen years back. Yes this was the friend he had had for a much longer time than that, but it wasn't the same. Alec had changed, and in that time, so had Bond. Dating Q had made Bond softer, kinder and _better_ and that was what Alec regretted the most. The loss of those traits.

He sighed and drained the scotch. Upon finding the bottle empty, he stood up, threw it away, and walked back to his bedroom with the intention of sleeping, but he didn't thinking he would. Too much guilt for letting Bond get hurt remained.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, I'm sorry about my semi-horrid writing. LS is better at that then me. I can make a story but ask me to write it and it kinda sucks. Again, sorry.  
> -TA


	4. Pancake & Tears

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Basically Q getting up. It's hopefully more interesting than it sounds.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really really really really really sorry I din't post last week, I was starting to watch Buffy the Vampire Slayer and got caught up. I know how it feels to want to read something and then you get really irritated when it doesn't post on time. So again, I'm really sorry.   
> Ls

Q groaned and rolled over remembering that James was in medical, and that- He froze. James had amnesia. He closed his eyes against the pain that washed over him at the though. Q had told his son, but his daughter, she was (in Q’s mind) too young. He would just tell her that James was on a mission and wouldn’t be home for a while. She was used to that. Q didn’t enjoy telling her that, but it was better than saying that he didn’t recognize her.

 Yesterday, the only reason he had told the minions that no, he was not alright, was because if he had said that he was, they would not have believed him, and therefore probably would have told M that he was mentally unstable as well as grieving. Q had to get up eventually, but he for the moment he just remembered.

 He remembered when Alec had walked in and told him that James had amnesia, remembered when he had called James at school to tell him the news, remembered when he had screamed at Alec, and how Alec had been kind, despite the fact that someone who was supposed to be his superior and untouchable was stressed and screaming at him for something that was not his fault. Q would have to apologize to him for that, though, knowing him, Alec would just smirk and say that it was OK and he understood, and that he would make sure that James got his memory back. Q normally wouldn’t mind, but sixteen years of memory had been lost, and that hurt. Oh god it hurt. James couldn’t remember James, or Penny, or even Q. Q was pretty sure that James learning that his father and namesake had forgotten him, had hurt. There was too much pain in the world.

 Q rolled out of bed and padded to the bathroom with the intention for showering, but after he turned the shower on, he just stood there, in front of the mirror, feeling numb. He just didn’t understand why the world hated him so much. Why couldn’t he care for someone without feeling like knives were cutting into his heart?

 He eventually stepped into the shower, but again he just stood there for a moment, just letting the water fall over him, the heat almost scalding him. Why couldn’t everything just be simple? Why could he not just live with his family in peace without retribution for his sins?

 He got out and dressed, then went down stairs. He woke up Penny and James along the way, and even he could hear the hollowness in his voice. He started making pancakes, and when Penny walked downstairs, she noticed the difference in her father’s demeanor.

 “Daddy is Papa OK?” she asked quietly.

“Yeah sweetheart. He’s just on a long mission and won’t be home for a while.” Q smiled in a (hopefully) reassuring way. “I told your brother yesterday, but didn’t want to worry you.”

“You just seemed more worried than usual. Papa goes on missions all the time and you’re never this worried.”

“Yeah well, this one is just a bit more difficult than his usual ones. He will be back.” Q slid some pancakes onto her plate just as James walked downstairs.

 “Morning,” he yawned. He looked carefully at his dad, making sure that he was OK. “Hey dad, you don’t usually make pancakes.”

 “That is because my cooking skills generally lack, but meh.” Q applied butter to the last set of pancakes and sat down.

They sat there, eating their food, the silence only broken by the clinking of forks on the plates. They all seemed to feel the tension that was in the room, but none wanted to break it. Q stood up and washed his dish. He felt empty. That was the only way to describe how his husband’s amnesia made him feel. Empty. Empty. Empty. That was all he could think. He was empty. Like someone had gutted him with a spoon and then took the feelings away with James’ memories.

 “Daddy? Are you OK?” his daughter’s voice jerked him out of his self-pity. He could feel the emotions rush back into him. He cursed himself. He had just sat there feeling sorry for himself, when he had two children to care for. The first thing he had learned in sixteen years of parenting was that children came first. Before anything. You could be starving to death, and you would give every scrap you could spare to your children. And he had just sat there when they had needed his help and comfort. “I’m fine Penny. Just thinking of possible scenarios that your papa could possibly be getting into while he blows things up.” He smiled at the memory of explosions that were caused by his wayward husband. He managed to make an explosive out of anything. “You guys should probably start heading to school. Don’t want you to be late.”

“Bye dad” they chorused, Penny happily, James worriedly.

 Q slumped into his chair as they left and put his face in his hands. He didn’t want to cry. Penny might have forgotten something. He didn’t want her see him like this. She was slightly unobservant, but she wasn’t that unobservant. Q loved his family with all his heart and now it hurt worse than anything else because all of his heart hurt. Why couldn’t he love someone who didn’t get himself hurt or killed every few weeks?

 As he sat there he tried not to cry, but he could feel tears leaking through his fingertips. He expected his daughter to come through the door and see him. He heard the door open and close, but he couldn’t hear the footsteps he expected. Then he felt hands wrap around his wrists and heard a voice tell him to stop crying. He hoped it was James, but knew it was just Alec. He held his hands firmly against his face, trying to keep the illusion that it was his husband come to check on him when he hadn’t come to work fast enough and wanted to make sure he was alright. Q loved his job and was normally there before anyone else.

 Q finally looked up and sobbed. “Why can’t he come home? He is so close and so far away at the same time, and it is killing me. He always told me that I was a light to his darkness, that I always brought him home. He thinks he is home, but I haven’t brought him home yet. I failed him Alec. I failed him. I promised I’d bring him home, and I didn’t.”

 “Q. It is going to be alright. You haven’t failed him. Not yet. You promised you would bring him home, he isn’t home yet, but there is still time. Don’t give up. He always manages to come back. No matter what.” Alec assured him.

 Q would always care for Alec. He was a brother. He was James and Penny’s godfather. He was the one who always comforted Q when he thought James was dead, or when he was unconscious after getting a concussion, or passed out from blood loss in the middle of Q-branch because he wanted to see Q before going to Medical.

 “I’m OK Alec. I’m going to go to work.” He took a deep breath.

 “okay. I’m going to leave, but if you don’t come within an hour I’m going to tell M to give you a sick day.”

 “I’m fine Alec. Well maybe not, but I’ll live. You need to get to work.” Q got up, but turned back to Alec, “Would you mind giving me a ride? I don’t have a car.” Alec gave him a small smile and agreed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If this was different or terrible, I'm sorry, but it is like 1:30am where I am and I was in the middle of watching the season two finale of Buffy, so I felt really sad and dramatic.  
> LS


	5. Surviving

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Q at work

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am going to try and write something worth a crap. Also: My characterization sucks so please don't hate, you've been warned.  
> -TA

Bond walked into work and immediately started heading over to Q-branch. He was about halfway there when he stopped himself.

 _What the Hell am I doing?_ He asked himself.  _I hate Q-branch. Huh. I think I'll go bother Q, since I'm already halfway there._ Bond didn't know why he felt like bothering Q-branch's leader. He just did. _Maybe it was something I did before I lost my memory? What the Hell, let's just do it._

He walked into the Q-branch with an arrogant swagger in his gait. He spotted the Quartermaster and smirked. Q was hunched over what looked like bomb shrapnel, looking disapproving.  He took a moment to appreciate exactly how beautiful he was. He had hair the looked like it would be soft touch, glasses that framed his beautiful face and he wore an adorable cardigan. He could stare all day. He strode up to Q and leaned in close.

'Hello Q.' Q jumped.

'Bond!' Q squawked, 'What are you doing here?' His voice had an accusing tone, like James had done something wrong. He was still half focused on whatever it was he was working on.

'Just thought I'd drop in and see what you're doing.' James purred. Q still didn't look at James,

'I see you haven't changed a bit, even without your memory. You're scaring my minions.' Q's voice was almost dead.

'Wound up tight are we, Q? Need someone to fix that?' James still had no idea what he was doing or why. It just felt natural.

Q finally looked up at James and glared. 

'If I needed help I wouldn't ask you. Now excuse me, I need to get back to work.'

 Well, that hadn't gone at all like he had expected. Q just seemed to get more angry the longer James was there. He wondered what exactly he had done.

*

Q had been quite content to just study the bomb shrapnel that had hit James, until the person it had hit walked into Q-branch. James had hated Q-branch before Q had gained his title so the probability of him going there was minimal. Of course that was not including the fact that the first place he went every time he walked into MI6 for the last 16 years, was Q-branch. Muscle memory had probably led him there.

Q started heading into his office when Alec walked up to him.

'What's wrong, boffin? Got shrapnel in your eye?' Alec halfheartedly joked.

'No, Alec. James came in. I thought you said he didn't like Q-branch before he met me?'

'He didn't. You do realize-'

'Yes, I have considered muscle memory. It doesn't make it any less hard. He is the same James as ever, just a little more emotionless and with a little less memory.' _  
_

'I know. I'm sorry boffin. If James knew what he was to you he wouldn't-'

'I  _know,_ Alec. That's the problem. As much as he  _is_ James, he is also  _not_ James, and that hurts, Alec.'

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, I'm sorry if this sucked. Just let me know if you want me to leave the writing to Lightning just let me know. If you don't actually care, let me know or don't say anything.  
> I repeat I can't really write so if you liked it, thanks!  
> -TA


	6. Sparring

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James (the younger) comes to MI6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I posted this really early, but meh. I felt nice. I like updating almost as much as I like reading.

It was a few weeks after James had lost his memory and Q was feeling depressed. He had once read something where it said that depression was not sadness, but emptiness. Whoever wrote that was wrong. It was feeling like the sun had exploded and left the world frozen, and that nothing would ever be warm again. I was like there was a void where he should feel something, but there was nothing. Sometimes the sun would shine through for an instant but then it would disappear, overshadowed by the overwhelming darkness. Q felt like he was drowning and no one could save him. When he went to bed at night he could feel the icy water fill up his lungs and pull him into the deep crevices of the ocean’s embrace.

He was broken out of his reverie by Alec walking up and tapping him on the shoulder. “Hey, boffin. Your son told me that he was going to come by later and wanted to get the idea run by you.”

Q glanced up at Alec, noting the shadowed eyes despite the light words and replied “Yeah that’s fine. He should probably get back to his training anyway. Do want to text him, or should I?”

“I’ll do it. You probably have some important project running that could save someone’s life.” Alec smirked at that. He knew perfectly well that Q hadn’t had a project since James had gotten sick. Alec then walked off to most likely text James.

007 had started to come down to Q-branch more often than he had before he had married Q, but still less often than before the amnesia. Q and Alec both thought muscle memory, since James used to always come down to Q-branch in the morning with Q.

Q wasn’t sure if he loved or hated it when James came down to Q-branch. He loved seeing James as he had been before, even if he always seemed a little confused. He hated it because it reminded him of what he lost. James would swagger in to Q-branch and start flirting with Q, his smirk planted firmly on his face. Q felt like he would snap in two if James kept doing that without knowledge of how it affected the youngest Quartermaster in MI6 history. If James would stop coming down, Q was sure he would suffocate with grief. No matter how painful it was when James came down, he was sure it would be even more painful if he stopped. Q needed James like he needed air. He felt like he was drowning and every time James walked down with his smirk and all that confidence, Q felt like something had been lifted off his chest and he felt like he could _breathe_. When he was there, he felt brittle, because James couldn’t remember him, when he wasn’t there, he felt like he was drowning. It was a vicious circle. He didn’t want to sound like a romance novel, but it was true. They had been married since Q was 18. James had been shocked at his youth. He claimed he was older than he looked, but in truth he was younger than he looked.

Q was drowning and breaking and the only person who could save him didn’t remember him.

00Q00Q00Q

James was standing outside of school when Alec texted him back. _Your dad says it’s cool. Do you want me to come over or do you have your motorcycle?_

_I’ve got my motorcycle. I’ll be fine. I’ll see you soon, though I may go over to Lee’s to study._

_I think Q will be fine with that. Be safe._

_I’m always safe. :P_

“Hey man, do you want to come over to my house to study? We’ve got that algebra test tomorrow.” Lee asked his best friend.

“Yeah cool. I figured you were going to ask so I already texted to make sure that I’m allowed.” James told Lee distractedly.

“Hey dude, you alright? You seem a little out of it.” Lee looked at his friend closely. He seemed tired and more than a little stressed.

“Yeah fine, it’s just my dad was in the hospital a few days ago and is still a tad hurt. But it is fine, he’ll get better soon.” Lee got the feeling James was saying that to convince himself as much as Lee. Lee wasn’t convinced, but just agreed, and they started over to Lee’s house.

00Q00Q00Q

James was confused as to why there was a _kid_ in Q-branch. Sure sometimes Q seemed like he was still in Uni, but this kid was at least in high school, he even had a backpack. The boy himself had hair that was a dark brown, almost black, colour and was extremely unruly. His eyes though were the most striking feature. They were a blue so bright that they seemed to glow. Someone had once told James that he had arctic blue eyes, and that was the only way to describe the boy’s eyes.

The skinny, but well-muscled, boy was leaning over Q’s desk, watching him. James wondered what the hell Q could be doing that required someone no older than 17. He could tell they were working on a mechanical device that James would probably get to destroy in a few weeks. If medical ever let him leave MI6. He was going to walk over to ask about it, but Alec walked in at that very moment.

“James!” He called out, but before James could move, which was surprising considering who he was, the boy had looked up and responded.

“Uncle Alec! Are you going to take me to the firing range? I would have gone already, but Dad said that I can’t go without an agent with me. That’s ridiculous! I am 16 years old; I should be able to go in by myself if I need to. I also have a shooting license.” Uncle Alec? That was a new one for James. Since when had Alec had any siblings?

“Hell yeah I am. I don’t understand why Q couldn’t just call someone else though. You guys are like family to me, but still. I am busy more often than not. Plus I needed to make sure the gym was open so we could spar for a bit, since your dad isn’t here to teach you.” Alec sounded sad at that last bit, which confused James.

“I could teach him.”

Q, Alec, and James’ heads all snapped in his direction.

“What? It isn’t like I’ve got anything better to do while medical has me here under lock and key.” James wondered why all of their gazes were so skeptical. It wasn’t like he had grown a third head, or offered to put on a tutu and dance the Macarena.

“Ok.” Q sounded hesitant to let James anywhere near his son (since when had Q had a son?) but he said yes.

“Alright,” James said. “Where do I start?”

00Q00Q00Q

Apparently this was a normal occurrence. James could tell. No one even blinked when Alec and James walked past with a 16 year old. Some of them even stopped to chat or welcome him back. When James asked where he’d gone, he’d just said that he hadn’t been here for a few weeks. Normally he was in and out every day to see his dads. At least that’s what he said.

The first stop was in the firing range, where James (why does he share my name, James wondered; it was confusing) proved that he had just as good an aim as Alec. When James expressed his disbelief, the younger man had just shrugged and smiled. From there they headed to the gym. James was shocked to see it was empty.

They changed into sweats that were in the changing room and walked into the middle of the room while Alec sat on the bleachers to watch.

“So how do you normally do this?” James needed to know how the kid exercised if he was going to do this properly, and Q would kill him if he learned that one of his agents had hurt his kid.

“Well, normally we start out by sparring and then we work out the kinks in my style.” The boy responded. “And if you go easy on me, I’m going to do my best to beat you into a bloody pulp. I certainly have enough frustration and anger built up to transfer into power and fight.”

James looked sidelong at the teen. He said that, but James didn’t know why. What could a teenage boy who was the son of a spy (possibly two) have to be frustrated about? He was 16 and had never seen what it was like to have someone you love die in your arms, or act like they had never known you. He was only sixteen, it was impossible. Unless something terrible had happened when he was really young, then he had an excuse, but while he looked a little haggard, he also looked healthy and well rested. That would be good for a fight.

James could tell that the teen had fought before. He was well balanced, and was standing on the balls of his feet. His stance was defensive enough that getting past his guard would be difficult, but not too defensive as to seem unconfident. This would be an interesting battle.

Then they fought. When James swung at the teen in front of him, despite having seen his stance, he had expected to at least hit flesh, but the teen, instead of blocking, as James had expected, had swayed out of the way. This startled the older man, and, had he been less experienced, he would have lost his balance and fallen over. Instead he used the near-trip and swung his body around to hit the teen from behind. This time, instead of hitting the boy’s chest, or nothing at all, he was blocked.

James just got more and more confused as the spar continued. He couldn’t figure out what the boy’s fighting style was. Normally when fighting, you either blocked all the time, or you moved out of the way. He had met very few people who used the second option at all, but the teen in front of him, instead of always blocking, or always moving, he used a mix of the two, to keep the older man on his toes. He was the only one who James had ever seen use this tactic, and it was very disconcerting to never hit your target. The teen never managed to get James either, but it seemed to always end on a tie. The fifth time this happened, James decided to ask.

“Why is it that you fight in such a strange way? I have never seen someone who fights like you do.” And it was true. The fighting style was the most unique that James had ever seen.

“I used to spar with both of my fathers. Papa uses brute strength, kind of like you, and I know that I can’t really take the blows as well as I can if it were a smaller person, so I dodge. I block as well, because it is disorienting to you, as I never have a pattern. The other way, blocking in such, I learned from my dad, Q, because it is more difficult for him to use brute strength, so when sparring with him, I usually take the blows, and since he is lighter, if I hold on, I can toss him across the room. It really depends on who I’m sparring with.” The answer was far from what James expected from a teenaged boy, but it was suitable.

They finished up the lesson by James saying that he could do absolutely nothing to improve the younger person’s technique. Then the boy asked a question that James did not expect.

“How much did you forget? Do you remember anything from the sixteen years you forgot?”

James was startled. Q had told the boy about his amnesia? "Q told a boy a 00 agent lost his memory?" James was skeptical that Q's work was that important to the boy before him.

"No, my father told his son that the man he was named after no longer remembered him."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comment pls! I live on kudos & comments.


	7. Who He Used to Be

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James meets Eve and questions her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so very, very sorry I haven't written in forever. I haven't had a lot of inspiration and the day I planned to write I couldn't get online. Really, really sorry. I also got so caught up in Buffy and Angel I sort of forgot...  
> If you want to follow me on Tumblr I have the same URL there as I do here.  
> If you want to see anything in this story fell free to give ideas.  
> -TA (so, so, sorry to have not written)

James was rushing down the hall when he ran into somebody. Grabbing the person's arms before they fell he looked at them. It was Eve. He was shocked. She had seemed to have been avoiding him since he lost his memory, only seeing him when she had to.

'Eve?' he said before he stop himself.

'007.' she replied in a clipped tone.

'You've been avoiding me.' he smirked.

'No I haven-'

'Yes you have. Tell me why.'

'Because you're not you.'

'I have no idea what you mean.'

'You were better.'

'I was okay before, wasn't I?'

'You were a good soldier. Somebody who could fight and win. What you became in the last sixteen years is something so much better.'

'What changed? What was I then that I'm not now?'

'You were a good man. You would try your best to stay alive for once. For something more than Queen and country. You became someone who would let emotion in and not reject any feeling that came his way.'

'I don't-'

'Yes you do. You don't care. You have nothing to die for.'

'You mean live for.'

'No I mean die for. There is nothing anybody in this world needs more than somebody they care about enough to die for.'

'And who would I die for, Eve?'

'So many people came into your life and changed it.'

'Than why aren't they coming and changing me again.'

'Because they care. They want you to come back as you were. One believes that telling you might cause more harm than it would good.'

'Why? What could possibly be so important or so different from how I live now that you can't tell me what it is?'

'You can't get me to tell you like that, James. I have known you longer than you have known yourself. You can't trick me into telling you anything.'

'What am I missing, Eve? There is something very important you aren't telling me. Something changed me. I can feel it. I just can't tell exactly what  _it_ is. Please, Eve, tell me.'

'I want to. I would love to tell you everything good that has happened in the last few years. You would be so happy, James. But I  _can't._

 OOQ OOQ OOQ

Q was in Q-Branch when James barged in. He looked upset, showing more emotion than he had in weeks. He looked pissed and he was heading straight for Q.

Q's minions were quickly moving out of James' path not wanting to die. He knew the look in James' eyes. The one that he had when he was about to do something that might kill him. Q was standing reading to face James head on.

As if it were a battle. A battle meant there was something worth fighting for. Q's problem was that everything he had worth fighting for was right in front of him.

'Is there something you needed 007? I'm sure any of my minions would help you. Though with the look you have in your eyes, they might not be happy to do it.' Q snapped

'What I want is the truth. Can I talk to you? Privately?'

'Come to my office.' Q's voice was quieter. Softer.

Q led the way to his office (as if James didn't know how to get there).

'What is it you want to know?' Q asked as soon as they arrived in his office.

'I told you. I want to know the truth. What is everybody hiding from me. Why does everybody look at me like I've either done something wrong or that something absolutely horrible has happened to me.'

'Because something horrible has happened to you. You have lost  _sixteen bloody years_ of your memory. And you don't seem to care at all. You have barely looked into your past  _at all_.'

'You think I haven't looked?! You think I haven't tried to find out what has happened in the last few years?! Nobody tells me anything! I have tried talking to Eve. She tells me how much better I was before! I don't know what was better! And you! You don't seem to like me at all but I've seen the camera feed, the only time you seem to show any emotion at all is when I'm down here. What have I lost?'

There were tears in Q's eyes.

'You have lost the only happiness you ever had. You told me that the worst thing that could possibly happen to you is to lose those years. And look what happened. You lost them. Get out.'

'What?'

'Get out of my office. I'm not going to tell you anything else. I'm sorry, James.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay... that went differently than I originally planned. Sorry for all the heartfelt scenes. Please tell me of any mistakes I've made and if anything doesn't make sense I'll explain.  
> I will not be posting anything in the next six days. (I get to go touring, yay me!).  
> Any comments are welcome and thank you for all the Kudos. Love to you all.  
> -TA


	8. James

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James is baffled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sitting here waiting for my jello to set and being born when BAM inspiration. Yay for readers (jello = jelly for you brits)  
> -LS

James was snarling as he left Q-branch. Q was many years younger than him and he had the audacity to refuse something that was rightfully his. His memories were something that he should have, and Q had yelled at him. He knew that most of his anger stemmed from frustration at not having his memories, and the fact that his beautiful Quartermaster seemed to know more than what he was letting on.

As he headed down to the garage he nearly bumped into Mycroft Holmes, who instead of threatening to ruin him like he usually did, the government official turned and called him. From half-way down the James turned, rigidly polite.

"Where is the Quartermaster 007? He is refusing to answer his phone. Though that may have something to do with the fact that I am calling." The man seemed irritated rather than angry, as James would expect.

"I thought Q was smart enough not to poke lions. He is in Q-Branch. Though I don't know why you would want to see him. You're from an entirely different branch of the government." James was confused, unless Holmes needed electronic assistance he didn't know how they could possibly be in need of each other's help.

"A mutual acquaintance of ours needs help in Siberia. I need Q's help getting in. And were it not for your memory loss, you would know why exactly I'm going to him for help. Good day, Mr. Bond." And he left, with Bond staring after him.

00Q00Q00Q00Q00Q00Q

Q laughed. He couldn't help it. Mycroft was going  _undercover_ to get  _Sherlock_. He didn't know if he was actually joking or not. Out of the corner of his eye he could see his amnesiac husband slide into Q-Branch, but he was to busy laughing to really care. Everyone in Q-Branch was staring at him. Including M, Tanner, and Eve, who had walked in when they learned that Mycroft Holmes was in the building, specifically Q-Branch.

Gasping for breath, Q finally managed to say "I'm not actually sure if you're joking or not, Myc, but that was funny. You  _never_ go undercover. That was always more of mine and Sherlock's thing. Mostly Sherlock. But I will help you, if for no other reason than he really needs to get home. He got Moran, da?" Again he could see everyone gaping at him. In a secret agency such as this, Sebastian Moran was infamous.

"Yes he got Moran. Moriarty's web had finally been destroyed. If the damn spider is dead. If Sherlock survived, I'm sure he could have. Any sign?" Mycroft was always more worried than he let on.

"I set up a program that will tell me if he appears anywhere on camera. But I don't think he is dumb enough to appear on one. And  _will you stop staring?_ " This last sentence was directed at the rest of the people in Q-Branch, who as said, were staring. Q started walking towards the kettle then called over his shoulder. "I'll get started on getting you into Serbia. But for now, get out of my Branch. I already see enough as is, if you start standing around at work, I might shoot someone. Probably you. Tell Sherlock to stop by and see Penny & James. They haven't seen him in years, they almost miss them more than their Papa. Ta-ta, brother mine."

Mycroft picked up his umbrella and walked out while calling out"ta-ta little brother" over his shoulder and leaving about thirty people staring after him in disbelief.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And as you now know, Q is a Holmes, I'll change the tags soon, but it is almost midnight here, so I'll leave it for now.


	9. Sherlock

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Q and Sherlock talk in Q's office.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I should stop apologizing at this point.  
> -TA

'Are you going to go see John.'

'Yes. If a couple days. After I have confirmed that he is well.'

'He's changed, Sherlock.'

'Obviously. People change.'

'Do you think that he's going to be happy with you.'

'Of course. I'm alive.'

Q sighed. 'You've been gone for two years. You have let him believe that you are dead for two years.'

'Ah, I see your point. Is that any difference than you refusing to tell your amnesiac husband who he is?'

'That's different. I had no control over what happened to him. You had full control over your actions and could have, at any point in time, informed John that you were alive.'

'You can tell 007 who he is at any point in time, dear brother.'

'And risk that he still doesn't remember. Or worse, doesn't believe me. Too much could go wrong.'

'I have things to do. Think this conversation over. Goodbye, Q.'

'Goodbye Sherlock.'

00Q 00Q 00Q

 James walked into Q-Branch to see Sherlock Holmes, who was supposed to have been dead, stalk out of Q's office muttering 'idiot'. James looked around Q-Branch and noted that it looked tense. It had seemed that way since he'd lost his memory. Maybe it was him. They seemed to talk like if they said the wrong thing he might start screaming in pain. 

He walked into Q's office and when he saw Q he was shocked. He looked like Hell. Like somebody had just told him his dog had died. He looked like he hadn't slept in a week and hadn't eaten in longer.

'You look terrible.' he had to say it.

'Thank you for that, Bond. It works wonders for the ego.' even his voice seemed strangely crack. 'Come to drag more information about your past from me?'

'Can you just tell me why you won't tell me anything. Or something small. Like, why the Hell hasn't my apartment been lived in for years. Nobody had been in there for a while until I came.'

'What makes you think I know anything about your past, 007? I'm just a Quartermaster.'

'Because of the way you look at me when I'm here. Like you've lost something and have no idea of how to get it back.'

'I won't tell you anything because so much has changed in the last sixteen years. You are not the man you once were.'

'Eve said something similar.'

'She's smart. You became something of wonder. We are afraid to force James Bond on you.'

'I am James Bond.'

'No. You are 007, the heartless playboy spy. You don't share your emotions and you certainly don't fall in love. You won't admit to the fact that you would do almost anything to protect the people you  _do_ car about.'

'And who is James Bond? What is so different about him.'

'He's a good man. He loves with all his heart and he will do anything to get home. He doesn't care about the mission, if he has to die to complete it, he won't complete it.'

'I do what I must for Queen and Country. What changed? There is nothing here for me.'

'You have everything you could ever ask for here. You just don't know it. Goodbye.'

00Q 000Q 000Q

James was confused, like he had been a lot in the last few weeks. Q had told him that he had everything he could ask for, but he wouldn't tell him anything about what was he had. Did he have a wife? A  _husband_? Children? If he had any of these things, why didn't Q tell him about any of them? Why-

James doubled over in pain, grasping his head. He heard a laugh and a voice he couldn't place telling him he could do it, laughter lacing their tone. 

Then it was gone. He could still remember it. But that was all.


	10. Penny

'Q!' Q heard a voice calling to him. He looked up to see a worried minion's face. 'We have received a message. It-it's your daughter sir.'

 

'Penny? She knows how to contact me directly. Why would you be receiving the message?' Q was confused. Penny had a cell phone. He wouldn't have gotten her one except for the fact that her parents were two of the most important people in the government.

 

'I never said she sent the message sir. We are being sent video feed, presumably from terrorist, and... well you should see this for yourself.' Q couldn't help but imagine the worst. Were they hurting her? Had they killed her? James had been trained to stand torture but Penny... she was only twelve. If they had hurt her they was not a thing in Hell to save the people who had hurt her.

 

Q was out of his office and into the main area of Q-Branch before his minion could say anything else. When he got there he saw a feed that had been transferred to the main screen. On it, tied to a chair, was Penny.

 

'No,' he whispered, 'Not my baby girl.' Despite the fact that she looked okay, Q was livid. Somebody had decided to snatch his daughter, who called  _007_  'Papa' and  _006_  'Uncle Alec'. They were going to pay. They would be in so much pain that they would  _wish_ they were dead. Then they would be in even more pain. Then, they would die. In touching Penny, they had forfeited their lives.

 

On the screen there was a voice. The voice made Q even angrier. They wanted something from him after taking his daughter. It was laughable. They had provoked the Overlord of Q-Branch and they thought they would  _get_  something. Laughable. They would die in the most gruesome ways possible before they got anything from him.

 

'Quartermaster, as you can see, I have managed to obtain your daughter. Now, here's how things are going to go. You will give me the names of M, all the 00's and the location of everyone of your field agents at the present moment. If you don't, she will die.'

 

Then they heard laughter. A girl's laughter, soft, but definitely there.

 

A man grabbed Penny's hair and jerked her head back so that her neck was exposed and pressed a knife to it.

 

'What's so funny, little girl, your daddy will give his information or you die. What's so funny about that?'

 

'You are so naive.' she said in a voice that could have belonged to someone so much older, 'You are going on about him but you forget who Papa is.'

 

'He's the Quartermaster. We know that.'

 

'Not  _daddy._ Papa. And my dear uncle.' Penny was smirking in a way that broke Q's heart. She knew that her Papa would come for her no matter what. If he was across the world, when he found out what had happened to her, he would drop everything and run. But her Papa wasn't here right now. Just a shell of what he used to be.

 

'And who's your daddy, little girl, and while your telling us that, who's your uncle?'

 

Then she laughed, in an almost carefree way but with an undertone of pain.

 

'You don't know?' she asked, astonished, 'My Uncle is Alec and my daddy is James Bond. I hope you don't value your life because you just gave it up.'


	11. To Have Never Known You Cared

When James got to Q-Branch he knew something was wrong. Q was standing in front of the big screen with a look of mixed feeling on his face. Alec, who had arrived seconds before he had a look that was part horror, part anger. On the screen was a girl who could be no more than twelve. On her face was the look of someone much older. Someone who had charge of a situation that they should even be in. And she was speaking.

 

'... But you forget who Papa is.' She thought she would be able to get out of that situation based on  _parentage_?

 

'He's the Quartermaster, we know that.' That would explain things. Q would send someone to get her, someone who could get her without getting her killed in the process.

 

'Not  _daddy._ Papa. And my dear uncle.' So Alec who be the one to get her. Simple as that. The faith she had in her father and Alec was astonishing though. But what had she meant when she said not daddy but Papa. Who was Papa? The people who had her seemed to wonder that as well.

 

'And who's your daddy, little girl, and while your telling us that, who's your uncle?'

 

Then she had laughed. James had to admire her guts. A girl of that age being like that in the face of death and torture? Impressive. It had taken him years of training to be able to do that.

 

'You don't know?' James could have laughed. She truly did seem to expect the, to know.  _He_ didn't know who Q's partner was and he knew the man personally. 'My uncle is Alec and my daddy is James Bond.'

 

She said something else but James didn't here is over the sound of his own heartbeat. Did she just sat  _he_ was her father. She couldn't have. Q would have told him. Then he remembered what people had been telling him over the last few weeks.  _You were happier. You found somebody to die for. You weren't afraid to show your feeling. You healed. You were better._

 

_You were better._

 

The words were ringing in his head.  _You were better_. He had a family. A son. A daughter. A partner. Nobody had told him. He understood now. Why Q only seemed to show any emotion when he was around. The look Q's son had given him. The looks he had been being given since he had lost his memory. They knew he had a family but he didn't but if they told him he might not have believed him. He almost didn't now. Or it might have made his amnesia worse. So they didn't tell him. Just let him know that he had been better. Unconsciously saying they wanted their own James back.

 

Q was giving orders.

 

'006, you and 007 will be retrieving Penny. You will be given specially created toys for this mission and are to bring the captors back to HQ and Alec?' Q said with a smile.

 

'Yes, dear Q?' Alec smirked back him.

 

'You are to make them die in they slowest and most gruesome ways possible. On tape.' Q had a dangerous look in his eyes and James was glad he hadn't caused it.

 

'With pleasure.' was Alec's reply.

 

'007, if you would step into my office before the mission.' Q headed towards his office without waiting for James' reply.

 

When James caught up to him he saw that Q had placed several new objects on his desk. In his hands was a picture. Q had a melancholic look on his face that made James' heart ache.

 

'You gave me that a year after we started dating. After the first time you told me you loved me, right before you went on a suicide mission' Q said quietly, pointing at a small figurine of a castle. 'You got it in a small town in Italy, after you finished a mission. You brought it to me while you were covered in blood and had a limp from having been shot. You said that the castle was a representation of your heart. You then laughed and said that you weren't the romantic type but I had done  _something_ to you because now you were becoming a walking cliche. But the castle, you said, represented your heart because it it so guarded. Built so that no one could get in. But I had found some sort of secret way in. You had told me that the castle had been battered and broken, just like you. I couldn't let you believe that. So I told you the truth. The castle is a perfect representation of your heart because it is enormous, beautiful and something that holds beauty in it's cracks.'

 

James sat quietly all throughout Q's speech, wondering why he was telling him this.

 

'After that,' Q continued, 'at the end of every one of your missions, you brought something back. Until one mission you brought back a ring.' he then held the picture that had been in his hands out for James to grab. 'That was taken last year. We took it in our back yard and you had decided to teach Penny how to make a small explosive. That's what she's holding there.'

 

'Why are you telling me this? Why now?'

 

'Because you have to understand. The man you are now is very different to the man I married.You can't tell her.'

 

'Tell who what?'

 

"You can't tell Penny you don't know who she is. If you get your memory back after seeing her personally, then I will be ecstatic. But if that doesn't happen, you can't let her know what happened to you. She's strong but the one thing I'm afraid might break her is the idea that you could forget her.'


	12. Finding Penny... And so much more

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is coming to an end I do believe. Not the last chapter, but getting close.  
> -TA

'Come on.' Alec called to James, whilst handing him a gun. 'We can't let anything happen to her. How much did Q tell you?'

 

'Not very much and way too much at the same time.' James replied.

 

'Do you know who she is?'

 

'My daughter. Who I raised with Q.' James still didn't know how that was possible.  _Him?_   _With a family?_ Not very likely.

 

'Good. Even if you don't get your memories back, don't let her know about your amnesia.' Alec had a stubborn and determined look on his face that warned James not to argue.

 

'I understand.'

 

00Q 00Q 00Q

 

Q was worried. Worried in the way all parents get worried. He hadn't seen much of his daughter in the last few weeks and now it was possible that they were the last that he would ever spend with her. He recalled when James had been teaching her to ride a bike.

 

_'Come on, sweetheart, just a little bit farther. No, don't stop. Just keep on pedaling. Your not going to fall. If you do, I'll catch you.'_

 

_Penny had then fallen off. James, true to his word, had ran up to the bike and got there just in time to make sure she never hit the pavement. He had then sat there with her in his lap._

 

_'Hey baby girl. I will always be there to catch you. You can always count on me to help you. Look at me.' and she had. Looked deep into her father's eyes, 'There we are, now I can see your beautiful blue eyes. Always remember this, no matter what, I will always be there. Try as I might, I will not always be able to keep you from harm, I will always help you get ready to get up again. Okay?'_

 

_'Okay. Thank you Papa.'_

 

 

Q smile at the memory. She had fallen and hurt herself so many times. Every time, when he was home, she went to her Papa. She may have fought James and him, and sometimes proclaimed hatred to them, Q knew that her deepest belief was in her Papa. Boys and girls always called her a daddy's girl and she would always say 'I'm no daddy's girl. I will  _always_ be my Papa's girl.'

 

That particular memory hurt Q's heart. He always thought of Penny as the six year old girl who didn't want to leave her Papa and always ran up to the door when Q or James got home yelling 'Daddy! Papa!'. He never wanted her to grow up. Now, she was acting like and  _agent_. She had to grow up too fast. She would always trust her Papa though.

 

00Q 00Q 00Q

 

When James and Alec arrived at the location they instantly incapacitated the guards, Alec hitting the head of one, James suffocating the other, and quietly sneaked into the building. Then the gunfire started. James heard Q in his ear.

 

'Okay, 007 you need to be on the right side of the hallway, 006 the left.' Alec rolled and just barely avoided getting shot in the process of getting to the other side of the hallway. Once they took out the men Q told them the location of Penny.

The room she was being held in was the most heavily guarded but Alec was brutal, taking out all of them in less than a minute. When they got into the room they took out the guards and the moment James laid eyes in Penny, everything came back, like floodgates being opened, and the last thing James remembered was the look on his daughter's face when an explosion of pain burst into his shoulder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also, I'm sorry but I can't write missions so please forgive me.  
> -TA


	13. The Waking

James woke up slowly, to a white ceiling. He looked to his right and saw Q, sitting there, looking extremely worried. James forgot what he had done this time. The last thing he remembered was grabbing that bomb and - _oh, oh god what have I done?_

 

'Well, dearest Quartermaster, lucky me. Even when you're worried you're beautiful.' The effort it took to talk with his dry mouth was worth it when he saw the look on Q's face at the fact that he was awake.

 

' Are you okay?' were the first words out of Q's mouth.

 

'I am now. I'm sorry.' the flood of memories from the last few weeks broke James' heart.

 

'For what, James? It's not like it was your fault.' 

 

'Oh, dear, if I had just put the bomb down and run it would have saved you so much pain. How long until we can go home?'

 

'You remember?'

 

'Did you ever doubt I would?'

 

'For a bit there? Yeah, I did. You had met your son and had no idea who he was. What else was I supposed to think?'

 

'I don't know. Though I am angry at you for not telling me anything about us  _at all_. Like, one word was all you needed to say and I would have known who I was and everything.'

 

'I did tell you and you only remembered just now!'

 

'Hello boys, did you just say something about James regaining his memory?' said Moneypenny sticking her head into the room.

 

'Yes.' replied Q

 

'Yes! Alec owes me 100 quid.'

 

'You bet on when I would regain my memory.' It wasn't a question.

 

'Yes. You had amnesia. What was I supposed to do?'

 

James just laughed.


End file.
